The Shower

This is actually the story that inspired the creation of this blog. Lady Bea said that I'd be in big trouble if I didn't post it, so here goes!

As any parent knows, once you have children, you can no longer enter your own bathroom unaccompanied. This is very true of my life. A few months ago I got into a routine when Bopbo was not in the hospital and I had both boys at home. As soon as Bopbo went to sleep for a morning nap, I would take a shower. Because I have learned that I cannot trust my almost two year old to stay where I leave him (even if "Cars" or "Toy Story" is on TV), Niles began hanging out in the bathroom while I showered. I learned to not get him dressed for the day until after my shower, because he frequently moved the shower curtain aside and played in the water coming out of the spigot as I showered and was completely soaked by the time I was finished, as was the floor.

One cold October morning as we are participating in this now familiar routine, I was rather enjoying my steaming shower. It felt wonderful to have hot water rinsing the shampoo out of my hair as Niles played happily in the water. I lathered up my shower puff with soap and suddenly felt an ICY COLD HAND on my butt. My little Niles had found the wash cloth that I had used on him the night before, put it over his little hand, reached into the shower, and began to wash my butt. As I startled and turned around to tell him to get his icy hands away from me, he looked up at me with his angelic face and said, "Puh, Mama!" (Translation-Help Mama!).

So while there is apparently no longer privacy or personal space in my life, one look from that angelic face... sigh.... Who needs personal space anyway?

If you could have any super power...

At some point in your life (probably while bored to tears, drunk, or high), you have probably debated which super power would be the best to have. Being able to fly. Invisibility. X-ray vision. There are tons of them. I think I used to want to fly (can't remember; again, mind turning to mush). However, now that I am a mother of young children, my opinion has changed. Ever seen "The Incredibles?" Who ever came up with the idea of Elastigirl, with her ability to stretch herself in all directions, was definitely a mother! I can't count the number of times that I have sat down with my infant and his cumbersome heart monitor, thinking that I have everything I need for his feeding, only to find that I left one of his medications in the kitchen. It would be so wonderful to just reach out my hand and be able to stretch my arm, bending around corners, to get what I need without having to pick up the baby and monitor and trek into the kitchen. Or what about when my toddler sneezes in the back see of the car and has a mile long string of boogers that need to be wiped? No need to find a place to pull the car over, get out, find the tissues, and wipe his nose. Nope. Just reach back and wipe his nose. Or pick up the dropped toy or put the binky back into the screaming infant's mouth! Being stretchy could also change my sleep! At one point about two months ago, our toddler decided to stop sleeping at night. We were so exhausted that we just put him into bed with us. Anyone who has ever slept with a toddler knows that he ends up perpendicular to the adults in the bed, with his icy feet on one parent and his head jammed into the armpit of the other. Into this equation factor the infant and his heart monitor in the co-sleeper and the twelve year old cat who sleeps where ever she damn well pleases. Needless to say, the only ones actually sleeping in the scenario are the toddler and the cat. However, if I were able to stretch in any direction, I could bend around the cat, avoid the toddler's icy feet, reach out to rock the infant in the co-sleeper, and still cuddle up to my snoozing hubby.

The cast of characters in my life

These are the people about which I will be writing the most.

• Pater Familias, my husband
• Niles, my toddler.
• Bopbo, my preemie

There will be more introductions as we go along.

My mind has turned to mush!

Setting up this blog should have been easy, right? It said that it only takes 15 minutes...or was it 5? So why did I stare at the screen for an hour trying to come up with a title? BECAUSE MY MIND HAS TURNED TO MUSH!!

For the past four months I have stayed at home with my two children, an almost two year old and a medically fragile preemie. Our lives have been a whirlwind of NICU stays, early intervention therapists and doctor visits since the birth of the baby. I am suddenly thrown into the role of not only wife and mother of two children, but also nurse, advocate, scheduler...

So why the untitled blog, you ask? I can barely put together a coherent thought, let alone a witty title. There is truly something to the "baby brain" phenomenon. And with the added complications of a sick baby, it's worse! My mind is so overwhelmed with medical jargon right now, that I don't think that I could start up a conversation about anything else!

I can't remember anything. If I don't write something down, it doesn't happen. I have learned to set alarms on my cell phone to remind me to administer the baby's medications on time. I have a calendar posted in the kitchen with all of our appointments each week; minimally there are two per week. Last week there were five.

In the midst of all of this chaos, I have sought out counseling, professionally and from friends, to help me cope with this unexpected life event. My husband has been nagging me for years to write in journal to help me process my thoughts better. A counselor suggested finding a way to connect with others via the internet, since meeting other moms outside of our home is not really an option. My best friend suggested a blog, because she enjoys my tales of motherhood and thought others would as well.

So here it is...my stream of consciousness. Some entries may be more coherent than others, depending upon the day. I used to write good... Maybe someday my untitled blog will have a new, witty name.